Creation of Song

The rasp of breath, pulse & pounding —
these are too easy, obvious.
The taste of blood in the back of the throat
a part of the tale we like to forget.

It’s not the sounds that creep out of silence
throbbing and thrumming in our ears,
nor the slow crawl of the earth’s crust,
the bright ululation of molecules

chiming as they interleave light orbits
curling into crystal structures
with a fugal intensity
beyond the senses of this human flesh.

Somewhere in between the nano and gross,
between oscillation, surge, light,
a cell flashes with heat to another,
a mimosa opens its leaves —

rhythms that flutter through evolution
in cracks, creaks, calls, cries; creating cadence
from clench and nerve, a loosening
that weaves through all and opens us.

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4 responses to “Creation of Song

  1. What a wonderful work!
    I’m a little stuck about ‘crystal structure’. ‘crystal’ just doesn’t flow.

    • Thank you, Skip! What I was trying to do in many places was make references to science and scientific terms, and that is where the crytal structure was coming in. I also loved that molecules in growing crystals are behaving in a way that can be considered reminiscent of a fugue, with repetition and minor variation. Perhaps they are more of a canon, tho. This is also a sylabic poem with a mix of lines in 8 and 10 syllables. Crystal structures fit that, too. I deeply appreciate the “no scanning” remark and seek out these types of comments about poetic strength and weakness, rather than simply like/don’t like comments. For NaPoWriMo, these poems are often dashed off in a rush with little time to construct properly, work with form or image leading, or use of other poetic devices. I am sure that with time and revision they could be stronger works. Giving in to that desire to revise would, however, defeat the purpose of NaPoWriMo. That doesn’t mean I can’t revise them and do a better version AFTER April is over! (/me beams) So your thoughtful reading and comments are very much appreciated.

  2. It’s beautiful!

    I’m struck by the language, how I love science in poetry, the gorgeous words, how they glimmer. I love how you reclaim “gross.” 🙂 Beautiful ending.

    The tempo is terrific — I hadn’t read your comment above (before now), but could feel the pacing in the poem, which works really well with the concept.

    I will come back and read your entire series.

  3. (It may be in May.) 🙂

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